An ocean full of desires. You are in the middle of it.
Waves of intoxication come and go, come and go…
You are struggling to stay on the surface.
Here is one more big wave coming!
Watch out! Take a deep breath!
Too late! It hits you straight in the heart.
You almost drown in the poisonous depths of lust.
Somehow you resurface on this ocean full of desires.
You pray for mercy:
‘Oh dear Lord, make me a better swimmer!’
Before you know it, you are underwater again.
You resurface. Your ego bruised.
You begin to lament:
‘Oh dear Lord, why me? Why am I suffering?
Why are You not helping me?’
No response. Waves of intoxication-unending.
One after the other, come and go, come and go…
You are drowning slowly in this ocean full of desires.
A woodlike piece of happiness appears on the horizon.
You grab onto it. Peace for a while. Stillness.
Even the Sun comes out from the stormy clouds.
Sex desire comes in the form of a tidal wave.
It hits you.
You lose hold of the woodlike piece of happiness.
You are underwater. Again. Drowning.
‘God must be dead!’- you think.
Frustrations in the forms of stormy clouds.
Sun is hiding beyond them.
Hopelessness and helplessness drown your heart.
‘This is the end! I give up! I surrender!’-
you shout into the stormy sky.
Grace descends. God appears and Love with Him.
The sky clears out. Sun appears. Waves die out.
The shore is within reach. You swim. You arrive.
The ocean full of desires is no more.
You offer a prayer:
‘Oh dear Lord, I am Your servant!
You inspire my desires, thoughts, words, and actions!
Treat me as you wish! I surrender unto Your sweet Will!’
Now, resting on the safe shores of the Spiritual Realm.
Everlasting joy engulfs the atmosphere.
And your heart is filled with it.
PS: Inspired by Clare Wilson and her Camino Story- Fin Del Mundo
Thank you for being a great fellow peregrina! Buen Camino, dear friend!