Evil Twin

There is someone living

within the corridors of my mind,

someone so foreign,

so distant, so isolated,

someone very depreciated.

He speaks like me,

looks like me,

behaves like me,

yet, he isn’t me.

He desires to exploit

the hearts and minds of others,

not really knowing that by so doing

he is digging his own grave.

Indeed, an evil twin dwells

within the corners of my heart,

fighting for every inch of land,

to plant the seeds of sins,

which will disturb everyone around.

This evil twin speaks within:

‘Cheat them, steal from him,

Lie to her, use them!

I am better than her,

I will destroy them…’

and so on and so on,

he is tireless indeed!

And I, simply follow his commands

just like a sheep who has lost its shepherd.  

Oh, Dear Friend Divine,

how can I be so blind,

and not see

that he is manipulating me

all around?

Oh, Dear Friend Divine,

allow me to transcend

this evil twin of mine,

allow me to accept him and

treat him as a friend,

so, I can serve and tend

everyone around!

Without Your merciful sidelong glance,

there is nothing good in store,

neither for me,

nor for this evil twin within.

Thus, kindly raise me above

and help me about,

to serve the hearts of others!

Your pretend to be servant

is making a plea!

Directionless

Tidal wave after tidal wave,

the turnings of the mind

they

rise and fall, rise and fall,

and don’t let me float above

all that drags me below

the surface of my soul.

I try gasping for precious air,

but only my ego gets inflated

and my mind screams-

‘I really don’t care!’

I put up my hands in the sky

and I keep begging the Divine

for the ‘right’ signs.

Alas, all it comes to my heart,

is filtered by my mind,

who is almost never very kind,

and distracts me till the end of time!

I ask You for the Direction

where I can find Perfection,

but You give me only suggestions!

I know it’s all Part of Your Divine Play,

I know You watch me from the bushes and the hay,

I know You always want me to pray,

but hey, it’s time for You to let go,

and reveal Yourself in Thy Holy Name!

Without Your Grace,

we are all directionless,

not knowing where to go,

what to do, how to act,

what to feel!


Without Your Grace,

we are like shooting stars,

running out of fuel,

soon to be put

out of existence!

Oh, Dear Friend Divine,

it’s only Your Grace,

that can show us the Direction,

on the way to Perfection!

Illuminate

Living in darkness

is not easy indeed,

but pretending

to have wisdom

is worse of a deed!

Looking within

the mirror of the heart

I see anything but

darkness.

Shadows of

past and future

lives are

crawling down

the corridors of my mind.

I’ve armed myself

with the cloth and spray

scrubbing every inch of dirt

alas, light is not coming up my way!

My old friends pride and anger

are dragging down my attention

and completely polluting my intention!

I try to compose a line,

so, I can glorify Your Smile,

but only brother lust

dances on the central stage

of my senses.

I’ve lost my way

and have no more

things to say

so, I guess it’s time

to pray!

Hey Dear Friend Divine,

illuminate my mind,

so, I can chase all the

shadows away!

Illuminate my thoughts,

so, I can compose some

lines for You!

Illuminate my body,

so, I can jump and dance

for You!

Oh, Dear Friend Divine,

illuminate my heart

so, I can be

the spark that

ignites the fire,

which starts a revolution

in the hearts of others!  

Oh, kindly,

illuminate

my soul,

so, I can surrender it all!

Divine Teachers

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me how to play

instruments for the pleasure of

the Couple Divine?

#

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me how to

decorate the clothes

for the pleasure of

Radha Shyamasundar?

#

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me how to make

the best of sweets

for the pleasure of

Radha Madan Mohan?

#

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me how to write

the most exquisite lines

for the pleasure of

Radha Govinda?

#

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me the most

exquisite dance moves

so I can delight

Radha Gopinath?

#

Oh, Divine Teachers,

oh, Divine Preachers,

when will you

take me by the hand

and teach me how to sing

melodious tunes

so I can delight

Radha Murlidhari?

#

Thus, this aspiring servant

is calling on the Divine Teachers!

Thus, this aspiring servant

is tolerating the blows of the mind!

Burden

I carry my pride,

my anger, my lust,

in the chambers of my heart,

but this prevents me from

allowing myself to trust.

All the cynical comments,

all the insensitive jokes,

and petty judgements,

are the heavy burden,

that prevents me from following hope.

Humility is a mirage in the desert.

Etiquette and respect are some things

that I can’t really accept.

Taking care of others­–

no, no, this really does not

matter!

More tolerant than a tree­–

nah, that’s not for me!

True, I am not this body,

but I am within this body.

Thus, I need to take care of it,

I need to bear with it,

I simply need to carry

the heavy burden I have

acquired.

Everybody carries a baggage,

so dear mind,

simply deal with it!

I know it’s hard,

I know you’re wild,

but with the help of the Divine,

everything will be fine.

This Boy Divine

is always anxious to help,

us the forgetful souls.

At the same time,

this Boy Divine,

likes to make us cry for Him

from time to time.

I guess we have to cry,

so one day the burden of our

troubles will go away,

and eventually we’ll be

able to dance for this Boy Divine.

I guess crying for the Divine

is the tax that we have to pay,

so we may enter His play!

Well, dear friend Divine,

please, kindly show me the way,

where I can pay!

Lost

Walking down the

forest path

veering to the

left and right,

for a moment

I believed

I was always right!

Suddenly,

I stepped on the

thorns of pride,

and lost everything

that I hold tight!

Then, the mind,

started acting

not so kind

and fooled me

so I became

completely blind!  

Now, lost in the woods,

completely blinded by

my moods,

I forgot the purpose of

of my walk.

It seems

there is only one thing left to do

and that is always listen and pray to You!

It seems I am gonna have to trust,

transcend all my lust,

and simply beg for your Embrace!

Actually, being lost in the woods,

does not seem that bad,

when You have me by the hand!

Actually, being lost in the woods,

allowed me to value

every step of the path

and simply surrender

fully my heart!

Yes, sometimes,

I will stumble,

but this is how

You make me humble!

Yes, sometimes,

 I won’t know the way,

but this is how

You like to play!

So, dear Friend Divine,

let me lose my way,

let me stumble,

make me humble,

but let me also

enter Your Divine Play!

It’s time!

Enough of adoration,

enough of self-condemnation,

enough of sense gratification!

I have been wasting day and night,

slowly losing sight

of Your words Divine!

‘Come to Me… do not fear!’­­–

does not enter my ear.

‘Let go of pride and lust!’–

my mind trembles in disgust.

‘Serve Me, worship Me, adore Me!’–

it seems my heart is placed

on me only.

Enough of distractions,

attractions,

and petty reactions.

Oh, dear brother mind,

it’s time for you,

to start worship the Divine!

It’s time for you to heal,

the wounds of old battles,

the scars of childhood fights,

and the traumas of your old ways!

It’s time for you to rise,

from the ashes of the past,

and simply fly above the

hurdles that come on your way!

It’s time to sing,

it’s time to praise,

it’s time to dance,

and lose yourself,

in the bliss of His Holy Names!

It’s time to serve,

it’s time to help,

and surrender yourself,

in the bliss of His Universal Embrace!

No more procrastination,

no more intoxication,

neither infatuation,

rather only dedication

on the path of Salvation!

It’s time to be more humble

than a blade of grass,

more tolerant than tree,

 and simply serve everyone

you see!

Oh, brother mind,

it’s time finally

for you to

secure your

trust in the Divine!

Fear

Surrounded by darkness,

doubting every step that I make,

creates an atmosphere

in which is hard to create.

Not knowing the direction,

striving for perfection,

keeps my heart in isolation,

and I end up in frustration.

Praying day and night

for Divine revelation…

alas, reality does not meet

my expectations.

Fear is crawling

in the chambers of my heart,

dictating if I take

left or right.

I struggle to fight back,

but without the mercy

of Your Divine hand,

I don’t see any chance

for me to get out!

‘Hey, brother fear,

I tried diplomacy and

kind words,

but you refuse to hear!’

Thus, there is only

one thing left to do

and that is wage war against you!

Let me call upon an army of saints!

Let me call upon the Divine Names!

Let the scriptures become my armour!

And let my japa mala become my sword!

‘Dear brother fear,

I solemnly declare,

that it is time for you to prepare,

to lose the grip of my heart!

I shall fight you from within

and from without,

I shall fight you from the left

and from the right,

I shall fight you from below

and from above!

There is no place for you to hide,

for I have the Divine on my side!

Thus, prepare yourself for battle,

as I am tired of you

telling me how to behave!

Thus, prepare yourself for battle,

as I am tired of you

stopping me

from stepping into my gladiator nature!

Voices

Voices coming from the left

voices coming from the right,

from the front and back,

composing a never-ending symphony

of dreams unfollowed,

of traumas unhealed,

and of problems unsolved.

The mind shouts at me:

‘I want it all!’

The intelligence reminds me:

‘Control it all!’

The ego demands from me:

‘I can’t let go!’

And I, the soul, in the middle,

am trying to transcend them all.

My head is a battleground

for voices, never-ending,

foreign, distant, and mysterious.

For voices, vicious,

evil and depressing.

For voices, happy,

thoughtful and supporting.

Amongst all this storm and thunder,

amongst all the confusion and illusion,

amongst this battle between titan-like voices,

I the little soul,

the innocent civilian,

am trying to connect

with the Supersoul.

I scream and shout

day and night,

till I can’t hear even myself out!


Alas, all in vain,

all my efforts silenced

by the titans fighting

on the battleground

of my head.

I guess, there is one thing left

for me to do,

that is only pray to You!

Oh, dear Friend Divine,

don’t ignore me!


I may be a useless servant,

yet, I am trying to be Yours!

I may be after material gains,

yet, I try to call Your Holy Names!

Please, kindly make this battle of voices end

now and for all!

Please, let there be peace,

so, I can glorify You,

so, I can remember You,

so, I can adore You!

Oh, dear Friend Divine,

please, make all these voices go off,

and let me hear only Your Flute Divine!

Reckoning

Oh, dear Friend Divine

it’s time to draw the line

and see where we have come

up to this time.

Words were said,

mistakes were done,

now lessons have to be learned.

We can’t move forward,

unless we sit down

and think it over.

We run after lofty ideals,

and preach all kinds of spiritual truths,

yet we are faltering behind,

drowning slowly in our own fear.

We go left and right,

offending everyone in sight,

yet proclaiming that

Devine Love is might!

We stumble on the rocks of

greed, envy, and lust,

yet we are shouting Thy Holy Name out,

and asking everyone else to follow.

Hence, oh dear Friend Divine,

You took everything away,

and never let us had a say.

Well, we reckon this is Your

special mercy

that comes to very few, indeed!

They say it’s special

‘cause your Divine Intention

is to always increase our

inclinations

towards Your direction!  

Indeed, reckoning is upon us –

‘Which way do we take now? –

The one that leads to hell

or the other that leads to You!’

I guess, we

have to sit and listen

for Your Flute Divine

to penetrate our

stone cold hearts!

I guess, we

have to be patient

and wait for the wind of change

to blow in the Right Direction!

I guess, we

have to pray

for your Divine Intervention!